faerie goth girl (or Maggie...whichever suits you)'s Friends
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Below are the most recent 25 friends' journal entries.
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| Saturday, November 7th, 2009 |
lotrfangirls
[ bigredanhorny9 ]
|
6:54p |
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/community.gif) thedivinerpg is a brand new panfandom RPG with a twist you've never seen before. We just opened this November 1st and we are looking for a cast of characters from the Lord of the Rings fandom to come join us for some otherworldly fun. ( Click to see our ad! )[If this sort of post isn't welcome here I completely understand, just politely let me know and I'll be more than happy to take down the post. :D] |
computerhelp
[ nyer51 ]
|
5:44a |
Huge Windows and fonts
I have a dell inspiron 1525 laptop, with Vista Basic. I left my laptop for about 5 minutes and came back to HUGE windows and BIG fonts. My desktop icons are BIG too. I right clicked the desktop and went to Adjust font size (DPI) but the setting was normal there. I have IE8 and I can't find anything to adjust window size. FULL SIZE is not checked in tools. I went to a trouble shooting thread, a person seemed to have had the same problem as me but he was told to go to adjust font size..ect. and I already tried that. So..any help would be appreciated, it takes forever to view a page since I have to scroll right and left and up and down just to view it. |
unsentletters
[ buildingonlove ]
|
4:23p |
I'm so confused, I'm so mixed-up... I can't handle it anymore. I'm so sorry. I know you didn't expect this from me, that's all my fault. Because I was wearing a mask towards you, I always acted like the happy girl, like the perfect daughter, but deep inside I was dying.
And now, it's just too much. I hided too much from you, since three years ago... And that's just too much.
I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry that I disappointed you. I'm so sorry... This has nothing to do with you. It's all my fault. Don't blame yourself for this. Mum and dad, you are the most wonderful people I know. I'm so sorry I did this to you. And I know I had to talk with you about it, but I just couldn't. Everytime I thought about it, I started crying. I couldn't bring my messy thoughts into words, everytime I got a lump in my throat and I felt myself breaking down, I started crying and didn't stop for at least half an hour. I was just scared. I was afraid. I was afraid that, if I started talking with you about this all, you wouldn't see me as your daughter again. 'Cause the only side of me you know, is that happy girl that was always laughing. You didn't know, so don't blame yourself for this. You gave me everything I ever needed, and I love you so much. Jolanda, know that I'll always love you. You always gave me hope, gave me that special feeling... The only goal I had in my life, was meeting you. Holding you tight, loving you. And I don't know if I can reach that goal. I'm sorry that I hurt you, I know you said it's nothing but I still regret it. I'll always be with you, in that place there in your chest - in your heart, my dear. I love you. My friends, I really want to thank you for your support and your attempts to help... But I think you also know there was nothing that anyone could do about me. But I appreciate it that you tried, even though I was too stubborn. Thank you. Thank you all. And I'm so sorry. I realized my goal in life is nothing else than hurting people and hurting myself.
You may think this is a selfish way to escape my problems, but I think it's even more selfish to keep me here while I'm dying inside, while I'm breaking down, only because you don't want to end up getting hurt.
There is just no other way. And I know damn well you're lying when you say "everything will be all right". With love,
Kiki. Even if the longing is so strong, I don't have the courage. As this community is for, this is an unsent letter. I guess because of my weakness I will never give this letter to anybody I mentioned. I just needed to write this down... Current Music: the GazettE - Nakigahara / DIM SCENE |
unsentletters
[ funnyhowitis ]
|
11:05p |
Dear mum, dad, I wish you all had more faith in me. The lack of confidence in my ability to do well hurts me in so many ways. The time i was asking you a question, you told me to shut up? I'm eighteen, i'm not an irritating child asking stupid questions. Did you see the way my face fell? Its funny, seeing how i'm in a good school, arguably one of the best in the country, yet you all don't seem to believe that i have a chance at a bright future. I don't understand. Am i already a failure in your eyes? Please don't bring me down anymore. Yes, i know i choose to be affected and its my fault. But how can you expect me not to be?! I really want to do well, and get us out of this shithole we're living in. Is it too much to ask for a little support from my family? I'm sick of being poor, sick of not being able to do the things i want to because we don't have the money, sick of having to give up opportunities. Please help me help us? With hope, Me. |
unsentletters
[ butterflydarlin ]
|
3:30a |
Dear You Again, Damn it. Damn you. That way you spend all these weeks so blatantly flirting with my next-door neighbor, then suddenly tonight you're knocking on my door, joining the Firefly party and sitting on my bed with me and it was "The Message," and it made me think a lot about what I last said to you when I never sent it. How maybe you were my Simon or maybe my Tracey. And I kept thinking okay, maybe, we were touching the whole time, maybe you'd take my hand cause it was dark and nobody was looking anyway, maybe at the end when Simon and Kaylee hold hands... And then we went out in the lounge and we were sitting on the couch, and there was more contact, and footsie, and you even put your feet in my lap for a bit, and you smiled so damn I-don't-even-know-what-ly. I don't understand you. I really don't. All I really ask is clarity... that's all I really truly need. me. |
unsentletters
[ dancergirl17 ]
|
3:09a |
Dear You, I was impressed that you knew my name on Thursday. I didn't think you did, considering how painfully shy I've been around you. But maybe you thought I didn't know your name either. Let's actually talk on Tuesday. :) Me. Current Mood:  hopeful |
| Friday, November 6th, 2009 |
unsentletters
[ eternia_aurora ]
|
10:57p |
Letters to the ones I can't send them to...
To you whose life is so important to me, yet mine is no longer important to you, There was a time when you acted as if you truly loved me. You worried about me, you did your best to keep me happy, you felt bad when you hurt me, you were scared of the possibility of losing me, and you assured me, and made me feel that I was the most important person in your life. You told me you would do everything in your power to keep from hurting me, to protect me from others, and to defend me and stick up for me when others came after me. For over two years, you stuck to this philosophy, even with the paranoia that I was stuck with, due to all of the horrible, faithless relationships I'd gone through before you. For two years, you made sure I knew every day that I was your love. I was your angel. No one could replace me, and you couldn't imagine living your life without me. Then, you came home from the military. You were finally free of all of the terror and stress and pain that the military had put you through. All of your dreams of being able to see me whenever you wanted, of being able to live with me until we got married, could finally come true. But it didn't happen. None of it happened. Nothing stayed the same. The man you were, the man I loved, the man I depended on for so long was gone, and you replaced him. I don't know you, and I'm not sure I want to. You don't care about hurting me, it's my own fault for being hurt, for caring in the first place, for having feelings. You don't care when your friends insult me, put me down, or make me cry, it's my fault for being susceptible to their taunts, and it's not your job to stick up for me anymore. You don't care about my safety, if I'm going to worry about riding with someone who is drinking, then I need to stop failing my driver's test, make an extra $200 a month for the extra insurance charge, and drive myself everywhere, despite that you tell me I can depend on you for a ride. You don't care about my rules, or my morals in life, they're my problem, not yours. If I don't like how you act, too bad; take it or leave it. It's your life, and who am I to control it? I'm your girlfriend. I've been your girlfriend for over 4 years. I sat there, day and night, while you were in the military, and prayed for your safety. I resisted the urges I had to find someone who could be -there- for me, in person. I stayed with you, even after you hurt me. I gave you chance after chance after chance to prove that you truly cared about me and my happiness. I've sat through hours, days, weeks, and even months of crying, of heartache, of pain, of depression, of betrayal, because I believe that the man I originally fell in love with is still in there somewhere, and that if I wait long enough, he'll come back to me. I'm the one who puts up with everything you do, because you're more important to me than you ought to be, but I like it that way. You've spent over 2 years proving to me that everything I went through wasn't enough to earn your love, your appreciation, or your respect. I've been threatened with you leaving me over some of the most ridiculous things. I've been berated for even caring that you hurt me, and didn't apologize. I get berated every time you upset me, for being upset in the first place. You can only take me for granted for so long before I can't take it anymore. As much as I want to be with you for the rest of forever, I'm tired of the pain, the worry, and the frustration you're putting me through. If I'm not worth your respect, then I don't need to be with you. If you can't even respect me enough to keep your promises... your OATHS to me, then I don't want anything to do with you. You're supposed to be protecting my heart, not trampling it. So here's the ultimatum I'm giving you: Give me back the man that TRULY loves me, or be free of me forever. ... in all honesty, I think you've been pushing me to leave so you can claim that you stuck with the relationship, and I'm the one that ended it. I feel like you don't care if I leave, like you might even be happier without me. If so, get your balls up and end it yourself. Stop dragging me through the mud and punishing me for holding out hope that you still care like you used to. Current Mood:  apathetic |
| Saturday, November 7th, 2009 |
austen_icons
[ midenianscholar ]
|
9:05p |
+25 Emma (2009) & 1 Variation +4 The Importance of Being Earnest +4 Princess Bride +20 Stock (people, seasons, nature) +4 Self-Fandom Teasers:   HERE @ ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) scholarsicons |
| Sunday, November 8th, 2009 |
depression
[ eelylove ]
|
11:15a |
|
| Saturday, November 7th, 2009 |
austen_icons
[ arlene_rosalie ]
|
10:42p |
|
gothikfaerie
|
2:41p |
guess my prev update didn't post :-p Tech officially over 4 today; the soundfiles that WORKED have been approved, so thats some relief. Now to edit a 43min Colorforms piece down to about a minute.. (*lots* of experimental/noise in this soundscape!) http://ping.fm/g9Yi6 |
ipod
[ gncurrier ]
|
10:56a |
I have a kinda weird problem...iTunes is coping the wrong artwork to the wrong songs on my iPod. Like, it swaps them around with other songs. It REALYY bothers me. I tried downloading the song again (I didn't get it off iTunes, I get music from other places), and re-adding the song to iTunes, and it still is messing the artwork up. I add my own artowkr, either from Amazon or pretty graphics I find. Is there any way to fix this? I even tried to reset the iPod, and still no change. Help? |
| Friday, November 6th, 2009 |
unsentletters
[ cluboxygen ]
|
6:45p |
I have two.
Dear Jason,
Thank you, for everything you've been trying to organize for me in the past two days. I know that we only just got back together, and that our relationship is still fragile and practically undecided at the moment. I also know, that us living together was the major problem in our relationship, and caused us to break up. I know that you don't like to do things without thinking it well out, carefully planning, instead of deciding/making plans on a whim and in a split second. But I also understand that you didn't have much of an option. I mean, to let your girlfriend live on the street and have to end the relationship we're fighting so hard to keep, or to bring her home with you. So I guess I'm trying to say a few things: 1.) I love you, but I also respect you, and I need you to do what's best for you - not me. Even if that means we have to put our relationship on hold for a while, or end it, because I'll be on the street. I don't want to be a burden to you, and that's what I am right now, and that's the last thing you need. So please, don't run away with the idea that things will be better if I'm there. 2.) I'll never be able to fully explain to you how much I appreciate your offer; even if it doesn't work out, even if your roomate says no. If this plan ends up to be a waste of time, I won't hold it against you, or try to make you feel bad for not making it work. I'm not going to blame you for my situation that I'll be put into afterwards. I'm only going to remember how you tried, immediately told me that if Kelsey agreed I could come when I told you about my predicament. I love and respect you for your big heart. I love you, I love you, I love you. Dear dad,
What you do know: I forgave you before you apologized, and I forgive you for choking and hitting me, and kicking me out. What you don't know: Even though I said all was fine, and that I don't care anymore, I'm still not going to live with you, and I'm not going to forget it. It's time for me to move on from you and mom anyways. Something inside me told me to not forgive you, and to never speak to you again, but also - since you and mom are heading to Vegas, and me and my sister are off to Vancouver, I'd feel terrible if something were to happen to you on that trip and that would be the last memory I had of you, and I'd live in regret after that. I'm also smart enough to know that ignoring you, and ignoring my problems are NOT going to make them go away, and that if we didn't talk about things, we'd only feel worse. So, I love you, but its' not a good idea for me to come back, or try to resume the level of closeness we had before. At least not for a little while. Also, I'm secretly glad that I bruised you pretty good around your eye - sorry though. Current Mood:  rushed |
unsentletters
[ e_jeliffe ]
|
4:47p |
A Letter Sent but Never Received
Dear You - So it's quite reversed this time around. I'm listening to EBTG around the holidays, on a plane coming home with passengers carrying toys and other gifts for their loved ones. I'm thinking of you, wondering how you're doing; how are you coping with all of what's happened and what you know is in store for the future. Read more |
unsentletters
[ rosiexrainbow ]
|
7:29p |
A letter to my idol.
Dear Billie Joe Armstrong, I don't know if you'll ever read this, but it means a lot to me. This letter was inspired by Amanda F*cking Palmer. She wrote a letter to Robert Smith and posted it on her blog. Reading it, I could only think of you and the music that was there for me when I had nothing else. I'm writing this listening to Give Me Novocaine. After that's finished, I'll probably put on 21 Guns, maybe Redundant, maybe Whatsername. I'll finish with Time of Your Life - like you do with your shows. I went to see you in concert for the first time, on the 26th October. I had spent the weekend before in bed with swine 'flu, and I still queued for 5 hours in the cold. It was worth it. It was worth the bruises from the mosh pit (and the door of KFC) and the relapse in 'flu that had me in bed for a week. It was worth every second of counting down - "156 days!" - on my MSN name since early May. You started by playing Song of the Century. Hearing every voice in Sheffield Arena sing along... I can't imagine what that was like for you, because it was amazing for me. You played 21st Century Breakdown, then Know Your Enemy. You played songs from American Idiot and "old school" Green Day and you did the most amazing acoustic Wake Me Up/Time of Your Life that I have ever heard. People around me were in tears, hugging each other. You could see in everyone's eyes that it was a night they would remember forever. And I was on the verge of tears too. Not just then - quite a few times throughout the night. When you played 21 Guns, you had a beautiful, truly amazing piano section after your guitar solo. Your solo, and that piano, and your beautiful voice... It took my breath away. And then I was lucky enough to see you again - not in standing this time, but seating. That was almost as amazing as the first time. Plus, you played Coming Clean. That was MY song. I can't even say how many times I've sat there, on the bus, or in school, with that on repeat, telling myself "you can do this." Telling myself that I wouldn't let them get to me. Your music got me through some truly horrible times, when I thought that I had nothing left to live for. I could relate to music that was written by you before I was even born, music that still rang true when I listened to it. When I came out, you were there to say to me, it's alright. Listening to Green Day made me realise that I wasn't the only one. I always had something that meant something to me, even when my own family weren't there for me. I seemed to drift away from you sometimes, but I never forgot who got me into the music genre I like now, the genre that has made me so many friends and kept me sane through the difficult times. What I'm trying to say, is you inspire me. Not to be a musician, because that isn't my strength. I could never make music as wonderful as you, and I could never command a crowd the way you did on the 26th October, and again on the 30th. No, you inspire me to always be myself. I saw the range of people from all different ages and walks of life at your shows. I saw how people dressed as you, because you really are that inspiring. I saw that I should never change myself to be accepted, because in your music I <i>will</i> always be accepted. I want to thank you for everything you've done for me and how you've helped me through everything life's thrown at me. A loyal fan,
Rosie Fulton |
unsentletters
[ foxy_baby05 ]
|
9:06a |
Just wish I could say it to her face...
Dear Aunt, Okay, seriously, what is your fucking problem?! You're pissed at Mom because she said you stole Grandmother's necklace when it should have gone to Mom... and essentially to me. And you have the NERVE to tell me that it was to "keep someone from getting it?" That's bullshit. And don't get me started on why we're doing so much better without you than with you. Maybe if you stopped being a bitch for a day, maybe people can start to like you. Sadly, you don't know the MEANING of the word. We actually dread when you call. Because you're adding MORE stress to my other aunt and Mom, and they don't need it, much less me. If I wasn't related to you, I'd have slapped you like the bitch you are. Grandmother would have smacked the living hell out of you for treating me like I'm a ten year old. And I'm 27. Big giant age difference. Maybe you're just pissed that Mom raised me with better morals than you had. I mean, cheating on my uncle with a MARRIED MAN and having his baby is NOT something a "Christian" woman should be doing. Any other man would have dumped your ass to the curb like yesterday's garbage, but my uncle stayed by you. And you treat him like shit. I guess it's all coming back to you, and it's about damn time. I'll wait for that apology from you. Until then, how about owning up and admitting what you did was stupid? ~your niece~ Current Mood:  cold |
| Thursday, November 5th, 2009 |
unsentletters
[ ssundaysunday ]
|
11:52p |
|
| Saturday, November 7th, 2009 |
ga_fanfic
[ slybrunette ]
|
10:20a |
|
feochadn
|
7:16a |
|
ga_fanfic
[ openended ]
|
10:01a |
Voting!
8 authors remain. 6 fics to judge. You choose who stays alive:  Voting is now open here for Round 5! Voting closes at noon EST on Tuesday, November 10th. |
excess_baggage
|
9:26a |
Trying to find a voice that reminds you of your own
Inspired by bearface and a lj friend i've decided to make a post WITH pictures hah I met my father recently and after a lot of word exchange and a fight I think we're finding common ground to start building on I'm trying to move past the past but any little thing sends me flying back and pointing fingers on why this is his fault but the point is I'm trying and that's all that can really be expected of me at this point and I finally think everyone in my family really realized the magnitude of the situation and is cutting my some slack I gotta go get my oil changed today it's 60 out today and that makes me very happy it's probably the last day of decent weather until 6months from now so I plan to play in it and drive with my window down Yesterday on my way to work taking river road which is always my favorite way to go I realized that the tree's standing against the sunrise sky of light pink and baby blue both passive colors but so intense in the morning the tree's looked like veins and nerve endings without their leaves and so the whole drive looked like a complex set of nervous systems it's a little bit awesome a lot of funding for the free clinic is being cut and that's a major bummer but joyce told me we weren't depending at that money anyways so that's good I volunteer there next week I also found out saginaw has the only free mental health clinic in the state I'm gonna go talk to someone about volunteering there too b/c I miss my mental health days a lot.... anyways I better go get my car's oil changed and go visit my mom at her new house and go hang out with brooke and lennon since the other day lennon on the phone kept saying "Ammo go bye ammo see lenny I'm lenny" lol anyways <3 peace amberjoy ( Read more... ) Current Mood:  pleased |
veronicamarsfic
[ fromthebrain ]
|
12:08a |
Boy Who Blocked His Own Shot [3/9] {Veronica, Logan, others}, PG
Title: Boy Who Blocked His Own Shot [3/9] Author: FromtheBrain Characters: Logan, Veronica, LoVe (eventually), the regular cast will appear. Characters (in this chapter): Veronica, Duncan, Keith, Lamb Rating: PG - may go higher in subsequent chapters Word Count: 1,923 Spoilers: Season 1 & 2. Disclaimer: I don’t own them. But it would be better if I did Summary: AU from Ahoy Mateys. What if Logan took Veronica's advice and left Neptune. Current Mood:  chipper |
| Friday, November 6th, 2009 |
raendrop
|
11:38p |
Holy Cow, I'm on track!
Total NaNo newbie here, and I've totally smashed through the 1/5 mark milestone. To win with 50,000 words, I need to have 10,000 right now. To win with 52,500 words, I need to have 10,500 right now. At the end of Day Six, I have 11,044 words. I didn't think I could do it, but it's starting to look like I can and will! Current Mood:  ecstatic |
| Saturday, November 7th, 2009 |
depression
[ loosedefense ]
|
1:06p |
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| Friday, November 6th, 2009 |
austen_icons
[ meganbmoore ]
|
7:02p |
306 icons
46 x Adventures of Robin Hood (1938) 68 x Adventures of Sinbad (1996) 30 x Beneath 58 x Emma (2009) 28 x Farscape 20 x Spring Waltz 16 x text quotes from Beyond Heaving Bosoms
40 x women in WWII, most images from here   the rest at my lj |
[ << Previous 25 ]
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